You Can’t Have It All, but You Can Have a Lot

Can you really have it all?

Can you really become a billionaire, marry a supermodel, have a happy family, be a Pulitzer Prize winning author, and be the world authority on stamp collecting? Probably not. But, deep down, you already knew that.

There’s a lot you can do, but there’s a lot you can’t do, too. This is real life we’re talking about.

However, you can have a lot.

There are several reasons why you can’t have it all:

1. There’s only so much time available.

You can’t have everything, because you can’t do everything necessary to have everything. Everything requires time.

• Getting and maintaining a 6-pack takes time.
• Becoming great at chess takes time.
• Building a billion-dollar company takes time.
• Creating and maintaining a successful relationship takes time.
• Being an expert water skier takes time.
• Writing a great book takes time.
• You don’t have enough time to have everything you want. What do you want the most?
  

2. Some things can’t coexist.

You can’t become the world’s greatest pick-up artist and be married. You can’t be the strongest woman in the world and be healthy. You can’t live like a playboy and maximize your spiritual development.

Certain activities just get in the way of other activities. How are you going to build a brick-and-mortar business in Phoenix and live with the gorillas in Uganda?

3. Your talent and skills aren’t unlimited.

You might have very limited athletic or musical talent. Maybe you’re terrible at math. No one is good at everything. And a few people aren’t good at much. Focus and work can overcome a lot, but they can’t overcome every obstacle. Talent is not irrelevant.

4. Emphasizing one thing leads to sacrificing other things.

As an athlete, if you emphasize your quickness and power, your endurance suffers. If you put a priority on playing the piano, your cello playing will suffer.

Any time spent on one area of your life leaves less time for other areas of your life.

There’s always a sacrifice to be made.

5. Sometimes it’s too late.

If you’re 38-years old and you’ve never played football, you’re never going to play quarterback in the NFL. You’ll also never be the youngest person to scale Everest. But that’s okay! There are plenty of things you can do that will fulfill your passions!

What it takes to have a lot:

1. Set your priorities.

Since you don’t have time to have everything, it becomes necessary to prioritize your time and activities.

Consider the most important things you want to have and achieve.

2. Determine what you’re willing to let go of.

Prioritizing doesn’t just mean deciding what’s important. It also means deciding what you’re not going to spend time on anymore.

Maybe writing that novel isn’t that important to you. Or maybe learning to knit isn’t the best use of your time. If that’s the case, make it a point to avoid those activities.

3. Allocate your time accordingly.

Once you know your priorities, use your time accordingly. If you’re ever confused about what to do, remind yourself of your priorities. Ask yourself how you can best use your time according to your priorities.

The idea that you can have and accomplish everything you want is a myth. It’s something motivational speakers and your mother told you to make you feel better. Obviously, you can’t have it all.

But you can still manage to have a lot.

Having a lot mean prioritizing how you spend your time. Wasting time is the ultimate way to limit yourself. Spreading yourself between too many objectives is also detrimental.

Always remember – you can have a lot! What do you want?

Keep these ideas in mind and make it happen!

ABOUT STEPHANIE ROBINS, LCSW

Stephanie Robins, LCSW specializes in individual, couples and family therapy, and maintains a private practice in Alpharetta, GA. With compassion and understanding, she works with each individual to help them build on their strengths and attain the personal growth they are committed to accomplishing.